You explain to them that your car doesn’t have power steering like she’s used to in mum’s car, but does that make a difference? You inform them that your brake is far more responsive than the bass pedal in mum’s car, but does that change a thing? Hey, I’m not being unfair, I remember what it was like to have this massive monstrosity which seemed milliseconds from being completely out of your control, and I mounted the gutter once or twice, but fuck, I never ACCELERATED WHEN I WAS SUPPOSED TO BRAKE. “OK, now turn right here. Remember, you have to put some effort into it, you can’t just zip around like in the station-wagon. Turn turn turn brake brake BRAKE!!” KA-THUD. Funny looks from the old crones in the white 4-wheel drive behind us as they squeeze past. Open the door, check the front passenger side tyre for damage, none present. “OK, now SLOWLY turn off the gutter, I don’t want to lose a hubcap as well.” We get home without incident. It’s only later on that I realise I have to have the steering wheel at about 35 degrees to keep the car straight. Bugger. And it’s a real bastard because wheel and steering alignment isn’t something you can do manually, well not legally anyway. Oh well, I’ll get my parents to cough up the money to pay for it. And I now have a water-tight argument for saying “No, you’re not driving my car anymore.”
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